Being YOUR Best Self

Recently my friend, a fabulous therapist in Boston, posted something on her instagram and asked the question "if it weren't for social media, would you still do it?" Man, that question stopped me in my tracks.  It has had me thinking every since. 

How many things have I wanted to buy or do because the idea came from someone who had it or done it and posted a beautiful picture of it on instagram?  How many experience have I had simply to take a picture of it and post it? How often have I gone out of my way to curate a beautiful picture?  How many moments have I actually missed because I was consumed with social media instead of being present in my life?

There are pros and cons to social media.  I love the fact that I can keep in touch with friends all over the place.  I love being exposed to places, people, and cultures from around the world.  I hate the fact that it removes us from authenticity.  I don't like the comparison and anxiety it brings from striving to keep up.  I despise that our humanity is removed and people feel like they can be cruel to others.

Think about it, how many times have you done something for the sake of or as a result of social media?

A personal goal of mine is to spend less time on my phone and more time experiencing life.  When I reflect on the times that have brought me the most joy; it's those where I did things purely for me.  I have the best time, am my happiest, and my best self when I stay true to myself. 

We are all made unique.  That is what makes us special.  I have different interests and talents than that girl that may look like she has it all on social media.  I don't need my life to be like hers, or anyone else's for that matter.  I was made me for a purpose.  While I may not always know what that purpose is, I definitely will not find it trying to live like someone else.

This year, let's focus on the things that truly matter. Do the things that bring you joy.  Even if no one else seems to be doing it.  Be brave.  Try something new. Live out your life and your purpose. For you.  Not for social media.  Eliminate distractions. Get back to the simple things.  Explore. Celebrate this adventure of life we get to live.

How Gratitude is Life Changing

Hello sweet friends,

It has been a while but I am back, in this new year, feeling inspired to write again.  I go through stages with this blog, an identity crisis of sorts, much like life; not really knowing what I want to write or share and what I want this space to be.  But, after some reflection, I keep coming back to this passion of mine which is wellness and living my best life.  I have a heart for helping others do that as well.  In my day job I help kids realize their strengths and how to solve problems.  My dream for this blog is to be a place for people to come to feel inspired by my life and stories to put their best foot forward and live their best life, whatever that looks like.

I have struggles and am by no means perfect but I am learning every single day.

On thing I have learned is practicing gratitude daily.  I have mentioned gratitude a lot on this blog before, type it in the search bar and half a dozen posts at least come up. 

If you look up gratitude in the dictionary the definition is: the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness. You see the word itself is a noun but the end of the definition [to return kindness] that is a verb, an action of returning kindness to the things and people you are grateful for.  Pretty powerful stuff.  

There are plenty of studies on gratitude which explains how it truly helps change our mindset.  I even teach gratitude to my students as a coping skill for when they are upset or suicidal because it truly does get you out of that dark place. 

I struggle with anxiety.  My anxiety comes from a place of striving for perfection and not feeling good enough. I have to actively avoid social media because I will get myself stuck in comparison.  I know my triggers but it is something I have to work toward daily. 

A few months ago, I started journaling ten things that I am grateful for every single day.  I didn't really think much of it, I am already an avid journal writer.  I didn't realize how much that simple act would change my life.  I don't spend much time on it.  Sometimes one of my ten things I am grateful for that day is my cup of coffee or my dog, to other things like a sweet conversation I had with a friend, or the fact that my bills are always paid, etc. You get the picture. 

In finding ten things a day I am grateful for a few things happened.  I started noticing things.  I paid more attention to the world around me, not only that but the good things around me.  I actually spent less money! I was more appreciative of the things I already have so I didn't feel the need to buy something new to "keep up" My anxiety decreased significantly.  I didn't let the little things get to me so much or get worked up about my to do list or what others were thinking.  I simply felt different, it's hard to explain, but lighter and happier somehow.  My boyfriend mentioned he noticed the change in me as well.

You guys, this gratitude practice works.  Actively writing down and thinking of things you are thankful for not only changes you from the inside but other people notice it as well.

In 2019 challenge yourself to practice gratitude and see how your world changes for the better. 

Be Kind to Yourself

The new year brings about a feeling of a fresh start for all.  Many are embracing resolutions and the "new year, new me" mindset.  Along with that comes a certain amount of guilt, whether it is thinking of bad habits we have built from the previous year or the negativity that comes whenever you might slip up from your new year goals.

I am so guilty of starting new goals, taking on so much more that I can handle in an effort to change, and then 3 weeks later giving up which leads to falling back into the old routines I was so desperate to change.  My narrative becomes "Why can't I ever complete anything? Why can't I see this through to the end?" Truly believing that I won't be able to finish so what's the point, right?

Then after a week or so of making unhealthy choices I am beating myself up, getting a new idea in my head of how to change, and the cycle starts all over again.  Then I put my worth in what I accomplish instead of who I truly am.

This is not okay.

So many of us do this.  We give ourselves value based on what we are able to get done, how much of the to do list was checked off that day, or even what other people might say or think of us.

That is not who I am.  That is not who you are.  I am a daughter of the king who created me to be  exactly what He wanted.  I am also worth so much more than giving up on myself and breaking promises that I make to myself.

Rachel Hollis discusses this idea in her book: Girl, Wash Your Face.  Do yourself a favor and read it.  But what really hit me in the face and spoke truth to my soul was this concept of breaking promises to myself.  I do this to myself all. the. time.

I am so much better than that.  I am worth keeping a commitment to myself, more than anyone else.  In sticking to my promises to myself I am proving my worth to myself, I am telling myself I am good enough and I am going to see this through. I am being kind to myself first and foremost because I matter.

So in this season of goals and resolutions, do yourself a favor, show up.  Follow through.  Keep your commitments.  Be kind to yourself.  You are proving to yourself and everyone else that you are worth it.

You are Capable

Recently, I just completed my 3rd half marathon. This one was definitely the toughest, most emotional half I have run.  Running a half marathon is no easy feat.  Running for 13.1 miles at a time can be rough on your body. 

I had taken a few months off of running, really for no good reason at all but I wanted to get back into it and decided to commit to myself to train and run another half.  Training this time around was tough.  This summer was hot.  Very hot.  Starting from square 1 to getting back into half marathon shape was a big mental game for me.

Running also gives you an incredible amount of time to let your mind wander. I began to think about how incredible the human body is.  How it carries us through life.  How it can run miles upon miles.  How if we push through the negativity and the mind games our body still can move and go further and faster than before.

You are so capable.  You are worthy.  You can try hard things and achieve them.  I have running to thank for teaching me that again.  This time my goal is to not to loose sight of my love of running and how incredibly strong it makes me feel, it's not worth it to stop doing the things you love.  Running helps me think, helps me decompress, and helps me feel amazing. I am a runner. I am so proud of what I have accomplished. Here is to many more miles.

Making Fitness a Priority

Location: South End, Charlotte, NC

Outfit: Yoga Capri | Tank Top | Shoes

This summer has definitely been the summer of self- care for me.  Being off of my real full time job has given me the time I need to focus on the things that make me happy.  Despite how busy I have been I have made it a priority to put health and fitness at the top of my list.  It has been glorious.  Working out daily is like hitting the reset button.  Whether I am overwhelmed and tired or just not feeling it a workout can completely flip my mood, give me a burst of energy, and make all my worries go away.

Today is my first workday of the new school year so I am having to make some shifts in my schedule. I won't be able just to walk down to the gym during the middle of the day anymore.  While, I know people have full time jobs all year long, working in the school kind of gives you two completely different lifestyles that you become accustomed to really quick.  Adjusting back to the all day work grind is just that, an adjustment.

My promise to myself is to continue to fuel my body with whole, healthy foods, and to workout every day. Whether it be walking the dog in the morning, going to a fun class with friends, a nice run on the trail by my apartment, or doing one of my TIU videos in the gym.  Every single day my body needs to move, stretch, and push itself.  Self - care becomes more of a necessity during the school year due to the nature of my job.  Health and fitness is one way I can treat my body with love and kindness.

This year I have really learned how my body craves a good workout.  I have also learned to let go of the expectations that a workout has to be a full blown intense sweat session every day.  The latter has made all the difference.  Listening to my body and doing something daily has helped me reach so many goals.  Even through a tough school year, I promise to treat my body right and keep fitness my priority, I know that with this everything else will fall into place.

What are some ways you make fitness a priority?

Bikini Series 2017 | Halfway Point

source

I have mentioned Tone It Up before, probably way to many times, but my love for the trainers and this program are worth mentioning! I love how flexible tone it up makes working out and eating.  Just follow the rules - but make it your own.  It's a lifestyle after all.  They are constantly coming up with new recipes, workouts, and general life tips that are always positive and encouraging.

We are now in week 4 of the summer bikini series.  Although, I am pretty terrible at check ins.  Which is where you post your meals and workout photos on instagram to keep up with everyone else doing the challenge, and to receive and give encouragement.  My office has NO service so I just don't / can't use my phone then pretty much forget after I am home.

Even though I don't post check ins regularly it doesn't mean I am not following along with the meals and workouts.  I have been loving this bikini series.  I am learning so much throughout this process, especially since this is the first bikini series I have been following.

I haven't noticed too many physical changes or weight changes but I don't necessarily have a lot of weight I need to really lose. The changes I am seeing are more mental.  I am getting better at refusing foods that don't serve me healthy purposes or make me feel like crap.  I have also noticed that I am doing more every single day.  I always have been one to work out - but I also had days or weeks where I just didn't.  Now I am more consistent in doing something every single day whether it be a short video, walk with the pup, or inviting friends to go to bootcamp or yoga. In turn, doing something pretty much every day has incredibly helped my mood. I also find that when I workout I pick healthier options to eat because I want to fuel my body and treat myself better.  It becomes a healthy cycle.  It's so much better than the old spiraling into unhealthy choices that I fell victim to often.

I can't wait to see what the next 4 weeks of the challenge have in store for me.  Just in time for summer!!

What is your favorite way to improve your overall wellness?